3 November, 2010

Approximately 4:00 AM Central time Dad Passed away quietly and peacefully in his sleep. More to come about Funeral arrangements.

2 November, 2010

Changes through the night or should I say in the last 3 -4 hours. Dads tem. is still really high 103.4 this morning his heart rate is still really high 127. The biggest change is he has started marbling. both in his hand and his legs.

post more later love you all
Jo Ellen

1 November, 2010

These picture are from this morning This is Ann the Hospice CNA who comes and bathes Dad. She is so kind and gentle with him. She is so wonderful.

There has been decline as to expected with dad the major things are his Temperature is high between 100.1 to 103.5 This is due to his heart beating so fast trying to compensate for less oxygen and his organs shutting down. his heart rate is high and has been as high as 131 beats per min. Lynn the Hospice nurse said it could even get higher up to 150 .
he is being kept comfortable with the Morphine.

Dads nails are starting to turn purplish. This shows that the time is close. due to his high temperature he may or may not marble in his legs but he could.

Other than that nothing else to report. Hang in there everyone.
Love you all
Jo Ellen

31 October, 2010

Dad has been running a fever any where from 99.1 to 102.0 over night and all day. His heart rate has been high between 79-92 . his respiratory is running fast then slow 15-28 . His breathing is very labor intensive for him. thus his body jerks as he breathes. No marbling of the skin or anything like that yet. his mucusy breathing is better when he has Morphine in him. he has been so rigged for so long and now he is like a rag doll. it is like he doesn't have to fight any more so he feels he can relax. Sorry this is short. I will post again if anything changes.

Jo Ellen

30 Oct. 2010

Today Dad is running a fever of 101.4 His heart rate is way up . This is due to his heart working hard to compensate for his organs that are shutting down. He having gurgling breathing and tries once in a while to cough up whatever it is but nothing comes up. his breathing is more labored. he is non responsive to his surroundings or anything I am doing to him (swabbing his mouth, Chap stick on his lips, cold cloth on his forehead, changing his diaper, etc.). No discoloration to his legs or feet yet. he is taking more Morphine for his pain he can have it up to every hour but currently is having it about every 4-6 hours. it depends on the day or the hour if he has 1/2 tablet or a whole one they are 15 mg. each. I am doing my best to keep his mouth moist so it does not bleed due to lack of moisture. I am also doing my best to comfort and do any other care needed. I kiss him on the cheek and tell him we all love him all the time. I also tell him it is ok to go and be with Mom and Grandma and Grandpa and Heavenly Father.

I believe I have contacted or at least tried and left messages of everyone I have a phone number for.

The Sister Missionaries came by today just to sing to Dad. I thought that was very kind of them.

Love you all
Jo Ellen

29 October , 2010

I know I just wrote but I ask you check this blog daily for updates from now until Dad passes. I may not be able to write every day but I will try.

Dad stopped eating completely after I wrote the blog the other day. Yes I still make an attempt to feed him but when he clamps his lips together like vice grips when you place food to his lips that is clearly a refusal so I wait and try in a minute or two and he does the same thing or you do by chance get a spoonful in his mouth but he does not swallow and you end up having to swab it out later because he what they call pockets his food. then it is all stuck on his gum's and dried.

The Nurse said this was what would happen and it is ok. So now the only food and liquids he gets is from swabbing his mouth out and the tinny ammount he gets in a suringe (orally) to give him his medicines. Not enough to be life sustaining.

He is caughing more and more because of mucus build up in his throat and lungs thus he is in more an more pain thus he is getting more Medicine for pain.

So I am telling all of you if you want to see Dad before he passes NOW is the time. As many of you know a person can live a while without food but not very long with out water.

when he gets into the active stage of dieing it will only be a matter of a day or two or even hours.
I know he knows what is happening to him and I know he is peaceful.

As I stated previously My home is always open. If you choose to stay else where I understand there is a B&B in town and a small old hotel and Keokuk Iowa has several newer hotels and such and is only a 30 min drive. all I ask is if you will send me an email letting me know who is coming. I understand if you choose to just go to the funeral. but let me know ahead so I can make the necessary arrangements. Dad asked that all the children be there thus money was set aside for airline tickets for the us children (sorry any spouses or grand children that wish to come will need to be paid by the individual family). There are a few things that will need to be done once we all arrive in Kalispell, Montana. Any flowers that we wish for him need to be chosen, Head stone picked out. etc. I know tha LaQuinta inn is near by and it is a nice place thus I thought I would just call and reserve all the rooms and get a better price sometimes they have bereavement prices. We are Talking Kailispell so be prepared there might be snow.


All other funeral expenses where prepaid and chosen. Unfortunatly him and mom did not purchas plots side by side at the same time but he will be as close to her as possible. there is 1 person between them.

So as I end this message today I want you to truly know how much I mean it when I say I LOVE YOU ALL and I MISS YOU so much. And I hope if I have offended any of you in any way I AM TRULY SORRY. I never intended to ever hurt or offend any of you. it pains my soul to think I might have hurt any of you I have always loved all of you.

Love
Jo Ellen

27 October, 2010

Today I have many thoughts and things that need to be said and hope that no offense is taken because none is meant.

We all know Dad is dieing this has been known for some time. Death is the end result of our life here on earth.
I know that many of the family members choose either to believe in no God (or a higher power) or choose not to worship God for one reason or another And some of us choose to Believe and worship God. This is how Families are. ours is no exception to the rule. Dad and Mom Both chose to raise us in a faith they knew to be true. I hope we can all respect there wishes and beliefs at this time.

Growing up we were all so close so forgiving and enjoyed being around each other. I know it is Dads wishes that all of us attend his funeral and put aside our differences for a few days. He wanted us to do something fun together as a family in remembrance of him and Mom. To be able to find forgiveness with each other and heal as a family. yes it will mean having patience , understanding , tolerances and letting the little things go like water of a ducks back.

We cannot continue hurting and having anger one toward another it causes to much heart ache and pain for all of us. We are all Adults and most of us have adult children of our own and grand children. Let us all act like adults and move forward instead of backwards. I know I miss each and every one of you every day.

Dad is passing away soon. His vitals are dropping and his organs are starting to shut down. He has finally given himself permission to move on. I know he has herd from most of you and would love to hear from all of you I think it would benefit him to hear you tell him he can go and be with Mom and Heavenly Father. please call any time of night or day I have my phone on 24-7 and I will place the phone to his ear so you can have closure with him. My phone number is 217-357-4898.

Today the Hospice nurse was here we talked about Dad and his vitals and what is happening to him. She agrees with me that he is calm and peaceful and accepting that fact that he is dieing. He is happy in his environment and this is good. She tells me I am giving him exceptional care. it makes me feel good but I still wonder if there is more I can do. She assures me I am doing better than the best.

Dads kidneys are shutting down. His urine is the color of rust and smells so strong. This is normal. Today his heart rate is 38 thus his heart is slowing down. His blood pressure at 3:00 PM was 84/60 his respiratory was 20 and less. less because he is having long periods of apnea (also to be expected). The only food he can eat right now is Applesauce he chokes on everything else even pudding now. and liquids are not even an option anymore he chokes on 1 ml of water that I dissolve his medications in. Dad only eats at the most 1 cup of food a day, any more and he refuses. He is in pain off and on and I have morphine for him when he is in pain. (hospice nurse has helped me to know what to look for to know if he is in pain or not.) So as you can see it will not be long that dad will be with us. Ann (the hospice nurse) feels that when the time comes he will just quietly pass in his sleep. She does not feel he is actively dieing yet but it will not be long. could be a week or two or more. it is all up to Dad now.

I f any of you choose to come and see him I have plenty of room and you are welcome. I also have skype if you would like to see him that way. the account that is open most of the time is i_b_don

I sleep down on the couch in the room he is in so he is not alone and I can help him if needed.

All My Love to you. Jo Ellen